Emotional intelligence — don’t forget the human element*

A lawyer friend told me a story last week about a case she had been working on. Turns out that years ago, one of the employees at her company was severely injured in a tragic plant accident while on the job in South Carolina. The case settled long before her tenure at the company began. Because of a bookkeeping snafu, the company continued to make payments for medical coverage for the injured worker for years after the settlement, payments that it had no obligation to make. Recently, upon discovering its error, the company decided to discontinue making the payments. My friend, the company lawyer, was tasked with communicating the decision to the former employee.

The former employee was well respected and very well liked. Her injury impacted many of the people with whom she worked as well as those in the administrative offices who handled the subsequent lawsuit, human resources issues and workers’ compensation claims. The company bent over backwards and went far beyond its legal obligations in assisting the employee at the time of the injury and, as it turns out, after the matter should have concluded with the settlement. Even decades later, people at the company who worked with the former employee tear up when discussing the case.

You might guess that it was difficult for my friend to manage the case because of the emotional elements surrounding the injury and the impact it had on the injured worker’s life. However, lawyers deal with many “emotional” issues and must separate themselves from the personal aspects of cases such as this one. She handled the matter as she would any other personal injury case – in a very business-like and professional manner. No problem there.

 
However, the real challenge came from within the company – from those who worked closely with the former employee. Because she was so well-liked, the emotional scars that remained were aggravated after all the years. My attorney friend experienced pushback from some of the employees with whom she needed to work to resolve the cessation of the gratuitous medical benefit payments. To her, it was simply a part of her everyday business/legal work. But to those with whom she worked, the case tore open long since hidden wounds and emotional trauma that evoked very emotional responses.

As in-house lawyers, we often deal with emotional issues. To preserve our sanity, we disassociate from the emotional elements of the matter so that we can make an objective legal decision. However, once we have done that, we must invoke our emotional intelligence skills in order successfully implement the recommended action, especially when working with others who may not be used to doing that. A lawyer’s “business as usual” manner may well be off-putting to those unaccustomed to turning off their emotions in this way.

In a situation such as this, to help ensure that such an emotionally charged task goes smoothly, the first thing one should do is reach out to those involved in the original case to get a handle on how the company dealt with the emotional issues at the time of the accident and the emotional impact that it had on the work force, paying particular attention to the people who were directly involved and their feelings at the time. Then reach out to those still with the company, and who would be assisting in effectuating the change, to assess their current emotional state regarding the incident. Clearly, as it turns out, they were still very much impacted by what had happened to the former employee. According to my friend, there may have been undue feelings of guilt associated with the accident and a general feeling of “there but for the grace of God go I” mentality. This may have accounted for the generous manner in which the matter was resolved in the first place many years ago. Whether these resurrected feelings are appropriate or not, they exist and must be taken into consideration when formulating a plan.

If you are tasked with carrying out such a charged assignment and you take the time up front to assess the emotional environment, you will be that much better able to implement a plan that accounts for the feelings of those who would be needed to assist in getting the job done and help them handle it without so much additional upset. In other words, you would empathize with those with whom the former employee worked, acknowledge their feelings and address the resolution of the matter in a proper tone and manner, taking into consideration their feelings about the matter, rather than adopting a “business as usual” approach. The objective would be the same but by accommodating the current employees’ feelings, you will make the job much easier for all involved and likely minimize pushback.

The lesson of the day is to be aware of the emotional impact your legal recommendation may have on your client base and communicate your advice so that it is received not only with an appreciative intellect but with a welcoming heart.

* Originally posted December 8, 2011

The Golden Rule

The Golden Rule, also known as the ethic of reciprocity, in its various manifestations and restatements over thousands of years forms the basis for almost every culture in human history.  Why then is it so hard to abide by this seemingly simple rule?  More importantly, why is it so hard for lawyers to practice it?

We are duty bound to zealously represent our clients.  Some lawyers treat this duty as a license to use every dirty trick in the dirty lawyer book to accomplish the client goals, as long as those tricks don’t technically violate a rule or cross an ethical line.  Lawyers are human beings and as such are not immune to moral and ethical dilemmas.  All of us, lawyer and non-lawyer, face choices every day.  Those choices have consequences – good and bad.  Many times, the prospect of personal or professional gain distracts us from making the right choice – the choice that we would want our similarly situated colleagues to make were the roles reversed.

Practicing the Golden Rule in our personal and professional lives should be the very essence of what it is to be a lawyer.   But, how do we reconcile our ethical obligations to our client with the universal of the Golden Rule?  That is somewhat of a trick question as I do not think they are necessarily at odds.

Lawyers have a system of rules governing the substance of what we do every day (statutes, regulations, court rules, case law) as well as ethical rules which govern our conduct.  When we play in the lawyering space, we play knowing that these rules are in place – we accept them as a given, something that comes with the privilege of practicing law.  Smart lawyers know and understand the rationale for these rules and do their best to mind both the spirit and the letter of the law.

Part of what it means to act zealously is to work to test and sometimes change the law.  In order to do this, we sometimes have to advance arguments that might seem specious to some, valid to others.  In addition to the law, lawyers must deal with people.  People are a part of everything we do.  Our clients provide us with strategic business plans, advertising copy, lists of people affected by reductions in force, contracts and the facts in litigation matters.  When one understands the fluid nature of the law and that facts are recollected by people with differing perspectives of what occurred, there is almost always room for legitimate arguments to be made.  However, making legitimate arguments is a far cry from manipulating the system, committing mischief, playing dirty or treating others poorly.  There is never a legitimate excuse for failing to practice the ethic of reciprocity, the Golden Rule.

As lawyers, we should first and foremost represent our clients to the best of our ability.  This does not imply taking cheap shots at opposing counsel or making frivolous arguments.  Rather, implicit in this duty is the responsibility to act within the bounds of the rules set in place by the authorities that govern our practice.  As a profession with a high calling, it is also our duty and responsibility to put ourselves into the position of the lawyer (and the client) on the other side of the matter and act according to the principles of the ethic of reciprocity.  Respect that lawyer and her client as you expect to be respected.  Treat the lawyer and her client the way that you expect and deserve to be treated.  Do not be underhanded, do not lie.  Abide by the Golden Rule in whichever manifestation you recognize it.

“…Love your neighbor as yourself.”
                                                                                                                             Leviticus 19:18

Be a good egg – pay it forward

The unemployment rate for lawyers is 3.2 percent*.  This means there are 56,000 unemployed lawyers across the country.  However, 1.7 million of us are employed.  That is a pretty good ratio.  Only health-care practitioner and technical occupations fared better than lawyers.  Although for the unemployed lawyers out there, the favorable ratio  provides little solace.

Over the course of my 23 years of practice, I’ve worked for three different employers –  a small boutique general practice firm, a Fortune 500 retail, catalog and internet giant, and my current employer.  When I went in-house in 1996, I thought I would stay at my company for the rest of my career.  Bankruptcy put an end to that in late 2004.

Over the years I’ve learned some valuable lessons about being ready for the next stage of my  career.  One of them is the importance of “networking.”  As a young lawyer I believed I had neither the time nor the energy to network.  I believed that my skills and achievements would carry the day when the time came to look beyond my current position.  This was a huge mistake.

I am a smart person with excellent credentials having worked for top-notch companies and with outstanding executives – just like many of the other lawyers shooting for the positions that I want.  However, having some connection to the person making the hiring decision puts me a half or full step ahead of my competition.  I am a known quantity, less of a risk.  I might even find out about an opportunity before it is published.

The most important lesson I have learned about networking is that the best time to actively network is when one is comfortable and secure in one’s position.  In good times, one has credibility as a networker because nothing is needed, there is no apparent selfishness.  A good networker simply establishes and nurtures relationships.  She puts people with complimentary needs together.   Of course, it is difficult for human beings to act with complete selflessness and so when we network we cannot help but to think there will be some payback in the future.  This may be true.  However, successful networkers do not think selfishly.   This brings me to my point (finally!).

Most of us have been helped by someone in our network.  In turn, we have an obligation to help another in need, to return the kind act with a kind act to another -  to “pay it forward.”

Ben Franklin described the concept in  a letter to Benjamin Webb in 1784:

…I send you herewith … ten Louis d’ors (gold coins). I do not pretend to give such a sum; I only lend it to you. When you shall return to your country with a good character, you cannot fail of getting into some business, that will in time enable you to pay all your debts… When you meet with another honest man in similar distress, you must pay me by lending this sum to him; enjoining him to discharge the debt by a like operation, when he shall be able, and shall meet with another opportunity. I hope it may thus go thro’ many hands, before it meets with a knave that will stop its progress…

Now is the time to pay forward the kind acts you have received from others.  This can be as simple as picking up the phone and offering an encouraging word or two, reviewing  and marking up a resume, arranging for an introduction or as involved as helping conduct a job search and making calls on behalf of your colleague.  The point is – there are many people out there looking for some kind of help in their career.  If you can, give back.  Pay it forward!  Do not be the knave of which Franklin writes.  Be a good egg.


*Originally published July 14, 2010

On the lighter side — time to take a break

“It is our best work that God wants, not the dregs of our exhaustion. I think He must prefer quality to quantity”

Scottish Novelist George MacDonald

Every once on a while, we need to take a break from the pressure cooker at the office, take time to relax and refresh the mind.  Every good craftsman takes care of the tools in his tool box.  Just as the piano must be tuned to strike the right key and create the perfect tone and the lab instrument calibrated to take accurate measurements, so too must we take time to “recalibrate” our intellect.  The in-house lawyer’s tool is our brain.  A rested mind is essential to the fresh thinking required to solve problems for our clients and address our daily tasks with a smile.

Our mind has physical needs as well as psychological.  We must feed and rest our brain like we do for the other organs in our bodies.  A healthy diet is good for the body and spirit.  I concern myself here with the psychological care and feeding of the mind as it is not at all difficult for me to ensure that it is well fed physically!

Sometimes the mind itself resists the notion of downtime.  It is often difficult to find time to take rest.  We are busy people with “important” things to do.  We make good faith commitments to help others, only to find that we are overcommitted.  We have little time for our families and friends, let alone ourselves.  We work, we serve our communities on boards or service organizations, we mentor, we coach, we volunteer for this committee or that committee.  We often do so much that when we finally get home at the end of the day we fall exhausted onto the couch, motionless.  This is not healthy, nor does it allow us to perform at our highest level at any of these activities.

Fall is fast approaching and with it a less relaxed atmosphere around the office.  Fall is budget time and the approach of year-end.  School starts for the kids.  Fall seems to be the start of a myriad of activities that take us away from ourselves, it is a time when all those commitments start coming due.  So, if you have not yet taken some time off from the office this summer, do it soon.  Take a day here or there and relax on the porch, lay in the hammock, read that book that has been sitting on the nightstand for months.  Take some time for yourself to recharge and reenergize your mind.  You will think clearer, be more productive and just outright do a better job.  Your fresh approach to your job will make you happy and your positive attitude will rub off on your clients.

And don’t feel guilty about taking a little time for yourself.  Remember, even God rested on the seventh day!


“And on the seventh day God finished the work that He had done, and He rested on the seventh day from all the work He had done.” 

Genesis 2:2

An Honorable Calling

“It takes many good deeds to build a good reputation, and only one bad one to lose it.”
– Benjamin Franklin

Practicing law is an  honorable calling.  Never ever forget that.  We are professionals duty bound to zealously represent our clients to the utmost of our ability.   Sometimes non-lawyers view lawyers as shifty characters who will go to any lengths to win a case.   I think this is because they don’t really understand how we work.  We make arguments that clients might not always understand.  We present the facts in a light most reasonable to the position that is favorable to our clients.  We posture.  We cajole.  We threaten.  We tear into people in search of the truth.  We often deal in unpleasantries. 

It is true - not many people are fond of lawyers as a group, until they need one. We sometimes then get the wink and knowing nod from the client, to demonstrate that they “understand” how we operate, they’ll play along and assume that we will take care of the dirty stuff outside of their presence.

Many clients do not understand that it is our sworn ethical obligation to represent them zealously, honestly and ethically.   I remember when I passed the bar some years back.  Someone sent me an article likening a new lawyer’s integrity to a brand spanking new shiny suit of armor.  The suit protects the lawyer’s untarnished reputation.   Each time the lawyer compromises his or her integrity, the armor is nicked, rust appears  corrupting the protective coating worn by the lawyer and eventually lays bare the vulnerable flesh beneath it.   This is an apt analogy don’t you think?

How many times have you encountered a lawyer that rarely does what he says he will do, cuts corners on advice, pads the bill a tad or fudges “just a little” on document production?  How do you view that lawyer when you next cross paths?   On the other hand, how many times have you encountered an adversary who behaves as the ultimate professional, who can be trusted not to take pot shots at you or use underhanded tactics to gain an edge?  At the end of the day, in which case does the client fare better?

Our jobs and our lives are complicated enough without having to negotiate the day (or the deal) worrying about whether or not the people with whom we are dealing can be trusted.  Whether with our adversaries or with our own clients, we have a responsibility to ourselves, to our clients and to our profession to be honest, to say what we mean, to do what we say, honor the profession, respect the law, do what is right and win.  How pleasant our professional lives are when we practice these principles and have them practiced on us.

So, polish up your suit of armor, strap it on for battle.  Shine for your clients and your profession.  Do the right thing.  Most of all protect your integrity, for at the end what does any one of us have left but our good name?